Stick A Fork In 'Em

Every year, the NFL enters a point in it's season where the playoff picture begins to come into view and those outside of that picture, begin to understand where they are in the scheme of things. The danger of this point from the NFL's standpoint is attrition. The difficulty is keeping the interest of fans during the final and most predictable weeks.

To combat the boredom effect, the league begins using phrases in it's advertising like "but the Redskins look to play spoiler..." and "The Seahawks are poised to defend their turf!". The three quarter point of every season is always full of contests plugged as "must wins" or "a game for divisional bragging rights."

I am fine with the minor deception because nobody wants to hear "The miserable Colts waste valuable jet fuel to imitate football players against the vastly superior Patriots."

But, alas, I must play curmudgeon and be real with my sickly-sized audience of readers. Here are the teams that are finished... done... kaput!

Colts (0-11): I will just begin with the obvious and spare us all the analysis. They are 0-11. Enough said.

Rams (2-9): I couldn't be more sick of hearing about how the Rams beat the Saints this year. Every week some talking head tries to pitch me the same bill of goods as if they are the team "Not to sleep on.." Hey, go ahead. Take a nap. Take a long nap right on top of the Rams. You have my permission. this team is about as dangerous as a rubber saw.

Redskins (4-7): This team is finished this year and in any other year that they insist on starting Rex Grossman. The fact that they went to Seattle and won by less than a touchdown has less to do with how good they are and a lot more to do with how bad the Rams are who lost to those same Seahawks 24-7 at home the week prior.

Seahawks (4-7): What does it mean when a team loses to every sub-par team they play whether they are at home or on the road, but beats every division leader they play? The answer... Not a damn thing besides that you are too inconsistent to be taken seriously. Besides, the Seahawks share a division with the 9-2 Forty-Niners. Got that fork handy?

Cardinals (4-7): Of the two NFC West teams that are 4-7, the Cardinals are the better team, but not by much. Kevin Kolb has been a disaster.

Browns (4-7): The AFC North has two 8-3 teams (Ravens and Steelers). That means, even if they could catch one of them, they are toast with another. We will probably not see a Cleveland Brown on the cover of Madden again for a while.

Dolphins (3-8): They are in the AFC East with the Patriots. I guess that's all.

Jaguars (3-8): Hopefully, the Blaine Gabbert experiment will pay off next season the way the Tim Tebow experiment paid off in Denver thus far. I would love to see Maurice Jones-Drew play for a legit team for once.

Vikings (2-9): Speaking of experiments, Christian Ponder still needs to be proven. His periodic flashes of brilliance are not nearly enough to counter balance the loss of Adrian Peterson. Come to think of it, it wasn't enough before they lost Peterson.

Buccaneers (4-7) and Panthers (3-8): Anybody chasing the Saints in the NFC South is literally chasing the fastest team in the history of sports right when the Saints have hit their stride. Not even Cam Newton is fast enough to catch them.